But even though I'm still really close with the band and such.. it still feels like i'm on the outside. I'm not actually in it. I don't have to go through the grueling three hour or all day rehearsals. I'm not there for the hours of bus rides. A joke will be made, and I don't get it, because I wasn't there for it.
And times like tonight.. I hear them practicing. And I am just longing to be there with them, on the freezing cold football field under the bright stadium lights, working our butts off to perfect the show, as one unified group. Surrounded by all my friends, bonding in the torturous hours of practice as exhaustion sets in.
I didn't even expect to miss it at all. I was ready to drop it all, all the drama in band, all the long horrible rehearsals in either unbearable heat or unbearable cold, the extreme lack of time to do anything else with your life, barely fitting in homework. But I do miss it now. I miss it so much.
I miss my family.
^^LOL.. my awkward, dysfunctional family.
Lookin' snazzy with that math team shirt
Me on the far left
Yup.. I'm missing this.