Wednesday, March 28, 2012

My Day

Well, from my last post I guess you can tell, I had kind of a bad day. Nothing really happened during school. I didn't eat all day at school. I was really in a bad mood. I didn't end up going to the counsellor, I had too much maths work to finish up to have time. I'm planning on going to talk to her on Friday though, I finished my maths ahead so i'll have time to go on that day. Maybe it would help a bit talking to her. I don't know, but I suppose it's worth a try.

Schoolwork!
haha, interesting right?
View from my seat at the library.
It's an amazing library, I'll post some pics of it sometime.
After school I went to the town library with my friend to study and finish up schoolwork. We ended up being there from 2:15-4:00. Then I met another friend and we went to go eat, but the place we were going to go closed and there wasn't really anywhere else good that was still open. So we went and walked around safeway a bit (it sounds really weird, but it is actually completely normal for us.. my friends and I hang out at safeway. not even getting anything, just like walking around LOL.) And we actually saw a lot of people we knew there. We ran into another friend of ours who is hosting two of the Japanese exchange students visiting our school this week, and I chatted with them for a bit in a cool mixture of japanese and english, haha! They were getting sweets to bring back to their friends in Japan.

Then I went home, and made myself eat a yogurt since it was then 5:15 and I hadn't eaten. I was pretty much just feeling really down and low-energy, I can't quite remember what I did though. Mum came home later and made chicken with rice and string beans, it was good but really difficult for me to get through the whole plate. I haven't had anything the rest of the night.

My yogurt- yummy and healthy!

It was just like how it used to be, with me not eating the whole day and not even wanting to eat at all. As you go through the day, it's like the further you go without food the less you want it, the more you are satisfied with your empty hungry feelings. I don't know if this will last, if I'm just having a bad day of giving in or if it's just going to get stronger. And I don't know which way I want it.. I feel like the part of me that wanted to recover and get better is now being pushed to the back again. Probably not a good thing? But at the same time, I like having the control back, I like going back to this, even though it's horrible. 

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